Good evening my lovely ladies! All ladies of different shapes, sizes, ethnicities, and origins! Once in a while I feel the need to check in with my ladies and inspire them, challenge them and encourage them!
I have been observing, as I usually do, and I’ve noticed a few troubling issues within the female community. Women took a stand a few years ago to be bold and natural. The natural hair movement appeared to be the biggest thing since the comeback of the skinny jean! The troubling thing is now it seems that women have done their norm, segregated! Come on ladies, what is the problem??????? I have personally experienced the side-eyes when I wear my hair in an afro from the straight-haired ladies, whether they’re natural or not… and I have also noticed the nose’s being turned up AND the comments being made by the afrocentric ladies when I wear my hair straight!
If there is one thing I preach, that is confidence, but if there is one thing I can not stand, that is envy and hatred. Ladies, take a look in the mirror for a brief moment and ask yourself this question, “Am I happy in the skin that I am in?…” If you answered “yes,” then this insecure, judgemental, uneasy creature that I described earlier should never be you and you can now exit this article and continue to let your vibrant confidence AND kindness shine for the world to see and continue to have a nice life , but if you answered “no” then it is time for you to listen up!
First things first, you do not have to prove anything to anybody!!! Therefore there is no need for you to let the ENTIRE world know that you are “happy to be nappy” and “all na-tur-el”! The best way to show that you are confident is to do exactly that, show it! Be seen and not heard all the time ladies! If you get relaxers it does not make you any less of a woman or less beautiful than the next woman. Women have created this standard in their minds of what makes them beautiful and unfortunately it most likely is stemmed by the media! What we all must come to the realization of is that everything we see and hear is someone’s OPINION! It is not the standard of what and who you are! ONLY YOU AND YOUR CREATOR are the determiners of who and what you are and will become! TAKE CONTROL LADIES!!!
It is time out for us to try to break each other down. All you do is reveal your own insecurities and fears when you constantly have a judgemental eye for one anther! Remember that the bible speaks about judging several times, revealing that it is something God finds very important! Check it out:
“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce your will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.
Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge. There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?
2 Corinthians 5:10
For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.
So many have developed that attitude that they “Can’t stand other women,” or they “Don’t deal with women,” for various reasons. Times can be trying but let’s not turn our backs on one another, we need each other. The reality is that if you can not stand a woman, then you can not stand yourself…. because regardless of what you believe, you are a woman also. We have to break down these judgemental walls and insecurities and realize that we are made beautifully and uniquely! Embrace who God has made you to be and celebrate each others differences, its what makes the world a beautiful place. There are so many other darts being thrown at women in every other aspect of life, let’s not make it harder on each other by being an obstacle to each other as well.
Ladies, no matter how long your hair is, how short, what color, what texture, or whether or not it’s naturally grown or sewn, you are beautiful! Wear it proud and wear it loud, because it is your glory!
I love you all!
By Tiffani Addison