God, The Father.

Learning to truly let go and let God is a more difficult process that I imagined. There are so many intricate factors of our life that we are so used to controlling, and we don’t even know it until we allow God into out hearts and a process of cleansing begins to take place.

It’s as if God begins to clean up our insides (our spirit) and as he is picking up things off the floor, and from behind other things, some stuffed underneath other things, and some so piled on top of each other that we didn’t even know were there. He is showing them to us, throwing some things away, repairing some and putting them in the correct places, and adding in some things that are missing. Some areas are more sensitive and sentimental than others. When God tries to throw them away we stop Him and prolong the process, sometimes we even tell Him He has to go. The process can be painful and uncomfortable but we must rest assure that it is all working together for our good (Romans 8:28).

When God is tugging at your heart it is because he wants it. Much like the way we tug and pull at one another when we long for attention and affection. God is the exact same way, but instead of Him desiring after you to fulfill His own selfish desires, He longs to fill you up with His goodness, so that you can fill someone else up and so on and so forth. God’s plans aren’t to harm you, but to prosper you, and give you  hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11).

A lot of times we want God to come into our lives when it’s convenient for us, and for our own selfish gain, but one thing we should know is that when we accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior when are now a part of a greater and divine purpose, way bigger than just ourselves, and we were bought with a price. That is not to be taken lightly. God is not playing when it comes to His word. So what He has spoken has no choice but to come to pass, one way or another, with or without y(our) help (Isaiah 55:11).

Besides the fact that God loves this world so much that He gave His only son up (a piece of Himself) so that we could have a chance at eternal life (John 3:16), He has designed a guide to keep us from the hardships of our own minds, by allowing us into His to see and understand what He made us for and our function (instruction) on this earth (a third eye, and elevated external yet internal mind), The Holy Spirit, another part of our God. He is constantly giving and giving and calling and trying to share with us His greatness and glory, for our benefit and prosper. But yet, we deny Him, and crucify Him daily. Putting others in the place that only He can fill/feel. Why do we love pain so much and why must we continue to kill ourselves in a slow, painful death. . .

I vow today. In front of God and all that are reading, that I will fight, fight for my life. I will not give in to the temptations of this world. I will not lie in a bed of thorns and watch myself bleed to death (die). I will not continue to collect evil spirits in my home (soul). I will stand up for what is right and true. I don’t have time to waste, I need my Father and there are some who He wants to use me to add to His kingdom. Let me be specific: I will no longer allow death, lies and destruction find it’s way back into my heart, mind and body. I will wait for my master, my groom, patiently, and allow God to clean me up, cleanse me, make me whole and pure, preparing me for my wedding day. That day when my Lord and savior Jesus Christ, born in a manger, a master who came to serve, a humble servant who called me friend, comes for me. And oh what a day it will be.

Thank you Father. For the measure of your love is immeasurable. I am unworthy to even begin to try to explain your greatness. My heart will explode trying to contain your love. My face would dissolve at the sight of your light. My hands would crumble at the touch of your glory. Father you are the one true living God. I could praise You all day and never get tired. My life is a feeble sacrifice for your goodness. My lips don’t know such words to attempt to worship Your name.

Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name.
Your Kingdom come, 
your will be done, 
on earth as in heaven
Give us today our daily bread.
Forgive us our sins,
as we forgive those who sin against us. 
Lead us not into temptation, 
but deliver us from evil. 
For the kingdom, 
the power and the glory are yours. 
Now and for ever.


Matthew 6:9-13

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